Most of us can readily identify with Robert in having shared data and received nothing in return. It has happened to most of us. In "Along Those Lines . . ." this week, I'd like to discuss the ethics associated with such e-mail contact and the correct etiquette we should all be using in these circumstances.

The Intitial Contact
Regardless of how we become aware of other people supposedly researching the same lines that we are, the first instinct is to make contact. That contact can take the form of snail mail, e-mail, or a telephone call. However, much of our correspondence today is done through e-mail—so let's discuss communication in that medium.

Your initial e-mail contact with another genealogist should always include a meaningful subject line. In this age of "spam mail," your inquiry has a much better chance of being read and responded to if it reads as follows:

Emory Lee WILSON - NC - 1865-1938

An e-mail from an unknown sender ID with a subject line that consists of "Help!" has a high probability of being deleted without being read.

In the body of any e-mail inquiry, be sure to state clearly why you are writing. Provide as much detail as possible and offer to exchange information with the person you are writing. The following is a good example of content.

Dear Nancy,

I am seeking information about my great uncle, Emory Lee WILSON (b. 12 July 1865 and d. 27 July 1938) and his wife, Dora Ester McKEY (b. 20 November 1866 and d. 18 April 1945), and their descendants. I saw your posting on the WILSON message board in the Genealogy Forum on AOL and am certain we are researching the same line. My grandmother, Laura Augusta ("Minnie") WILSON was Emory Lee WILSON's youngest sister. I have information about Minnie, the other siblings, and some of those people's spouses and descendants.

I would like to compare notes and share information with you. I can provide some information from my database and see if we have more in common to research.

Sincerely,
[your name here]

You don't need to provide your mailing address or telephone number at this point. Wait to see what, if any, response you receive.

Evaluating the Response and Responding
Assuming you receive a reply, it is time to evaluate whether the person really has something to share. As Mr. Carneal so accurately stated, there is a potential your correspondent will ask you for information but may provide nothing in return.

Personally, I respond to such inquiries and offer to send information from my database. There is always value in sharing such data. Not only can I share the content of my research, but I also try to encourage the other person to share his or her data. The other person may feel that there is little or nothing to offer, however I try to dispel this feeling when we continue our correspondence. One of the ways I do this is by saying, "No matter how much or how little each of us has uncovered, it is good for us to exchange as much as possible. Every fact from every source is valuable. We may have duplicated research or we may have arrived at the same fact through different sources, in which case your source may corroborate mine—or it may send us both off in search of another source that verifies your OR my findings."

The initial information I send is usually in the form of a text extract—perhaps an outline genealogy report or a descendant report—from my database. I quickly create the report, taking pains to privatize living individuals and their data, and then cut and paste it into an e-mail response. At this point, I have invested a small amount of time in anticipation of a similar or greater response.

Unfortunately, there is no way to guarantee you will receive anything in return. Sometimes, in anticipation of a response, I will check to see if there has been a GEDCOM file submitted to one or more of the online sites that accept and archive these files. There I will look for what I believe might be a common individual to both our files, and then I look at submitters' e-mail addresses or names. Some of the places I check include the File Libraries Center (AOL subscribers only) in the Genealogy Forum on America Online (AOL subscribers only Keyword: ROOTS) or the World Tree at http://www.ancestry.com/worldtree/tree.htm. The presence of such data usually gives me a good feeling about the person and his/her ability and willingness to share data.

If the response you receive from the individual shows a level of interest, and if the person seems willing to share, you may be ready to exchange some paper copies of materials. Always make it clear what you are willing to provide and agree up front to any cost considerations. One person asked me to make copies of pension file records I'd received from the National Archives. The cost to photocopy these 11" x 17" sheets and mail them was not insignificant—approximately $48. We agreed to the cost and the individual sent me a check before I expended the time, effort, and expense to make the copies. In another case, I offered to pay for church and cemetery photographs and developing charges but was refused. Remember, too, that enclosing a self-addressed stamped envelope (SASE) always provides a good incentive for your correspondent to send more to you.

If you have sent materials, whether by e-mail or snail mail, and have not received an acknowledgement or reply, a gentle follow-up inquiry is not out of line. A friend of mine sends one of those free e-mail greeting cards or a USPS postcard to say, "Hi! I hope you found the information on the JONES family of interest and value, and I'm looking forward to some great material from you too!"

Squeezing out the Spongers
There are always going to be those who take and seldom provide anything in return. In all the years I've been researching my family history, though, I've found the spongers to be in the definite minority. Most genealogical researchers are considerate, courteous, and exceedingly generous in sharing their experiences and information they have uncovered. The spongers should not lessen the enjoyment of the pursuit.

If you are concerned about being burned in the data exchange process, I'd suggest you start slow in the sharing of information. Don't immediately rush to make copies of all the materials you have about a line. Exchange information a bit at a time as specific questions are asked.

Gracious Responses
Whenever you receive something of value, be certain to send a courteous "thank you." As your mother taught you, it takes so little time to write a "thank you" note and it is always appreciated. It is appropriate to respond to acknowledge receipt of the information and to say you will respond as soon as you've had a chance to review it. If you say that, the proper etiquette is always to follow through with a response—and another "thank you."

Also, if you get fewer materials or lesser quality information than you expected, remember that each piece really is valuable. If nothing else, you have either confirmed or discounted your previous research in some way.

Finally, maintain a positive attitude toward the exchange of information with other researchers. As more people begin working on their family history research, you will encounter more and more people working on your lines. In the past month, for instance, I have met three new cousins: two researching the WILSON line and one researching the WEATHERLY line.

Don't stop exchanging information with others because of one or two less-than-satisfactory experiences. Keep the doors open for new and positive opportunities. You can only learn more when you share information and build a larger networking team.

Happy hunting!

George

The article originally appeared in the Genealogy Forum on America Online. You may send e-mail to alonglines@aol.com. George Morgan would like to hear from you but, because of the volume of e-mail, is unable to personally respond to each letter individually. He also regrets that he cannot assist you with your personal genealogical research. Visit George Morgan's new Web page at: http://members.aol.com/alonglines

George is also the author of "The Genealogy Forum on America Online," which is available in the Ancestry Online Store at: http://shop.myfamily.com/ancestrycatalog/
product.asp?pf%5Fid=1101046&dept%5Fid=10102000.